Epic Rap Battles - Dr Seuss vs. Shakespeare

The Fab Four do Shakespeare

When Beatles tackle Shakespeare it's called a  

 Beatles Bardle Battle!

Quote #021

"Beware the ides of March"

Soothsayer - 'Julius Caesar' Act I, Scene 1

21 - Julius Caesar

This has been the hardest read yet. Not because of the text but because of my own history with the play.

In my post on Romeo and Juliet I mentioned that the REPO men had tackled one other of the Bard's back catalogue and this was it. REPO productions were proud to present... a three man version of Julius Caesar heavily edited so as to play for laughs but with a bit of pathos thrown in for good measure! I played Brutus, another played Cassius, the third both Caesar and Anthony. We filled in for those other parts which had made it past the edit by wearing different hats or coats but always in togas and army boots! The only other person on stage was Sooty (also in a toga) who we needed in the conspirators scene to swell the numbers.

So my problem now is that as I read it I can still see and hear all the gags - Caesar in Groucho specks, nose and tash; constant references to Cassius passing wind; the senate assassination undertaken with flowers rather than daggers ("At-choo Brute!"); and a moving mime show, of the senseless slaughter as Roman fought Roman, to the haunting strains of Morriconi's score from 'The Mission'. I know there is also an excellent play by Shakespeare in there somewhere but it's hard to see. 

Having said that I believe our version was great fun and the closest yet that I have come to performing Shakespeare in full. We staged it originally to try and be short-listed for a student drama competition, although unfortunately we didn't get through. The organisers did, however, ask us if we wanted to put it on as a cabaret act for the actual competitors. But as they wouldn't have been paying us we declined - shame really.

And Finally - Strange, but I can't find one classic line in my text - "Infamy! Infamy! They've all got it in-for-me!"

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Sportive Tricks

I'm not an overly patriotic person (and certainty not a major lover of sports) but I was moved by the Olympic opening ceremony for the London 2012 games. And what kind of ceremony wound it have been without at least one nod to Billy-Boy Bard.

So it was delightful to see the great Kenneth Branagh quoting from 'The Tempest' Caliban's description of his own Isle of Wonder. 

"Be not afeard; the isle is full of noises,
Sounds, and sweet airs, that give delight and hurt not.
Sometimes a thousand twangling instruments
Will hum about mine ears, and sometime voices,
That if I then had wak'd after long sleep,
Will make me sleep again, and then in dreaming,
The clouds methought would open and show riches
Ready to drop upon me, that when I wak'd,
I cried to dream again." Act III, Scene 2

And of course that first line is also inscribed upon the gigantic 23 tonne Olympic Bell that was struck but Tour de France winner Bradley Wiggins to mark the start of the ceremony. So the Bard was catered for and, thanks to Branagh and Bradley's mutton-chops, so was the Beard!

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Quote #020

"Could I come near your beauty with my nails,
I’d set my ten commandments in your face."

Duchess of Gloucester - 'Henry VI Part 2', Act I, scene 3

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20 - King Henry VI Part 2

Be prepared for a Battle Royal! Last man standing will take the kingdom!

I found this second part to be far superior to all the running around France in part one! So here's hoping that part three continues the trend rather than doing a Star Wars!

Which of course sets my mind off at a tangent by first imagining 'A Star Wars of the Roses' (with Ewoks!) and secondly by thinking of loads of Shakespeare / Star Wars mash-up quotes:

"To be or not to be, the question that is! Yes!"

"This isn't the changling boy you're looking for"

"Spys! Bothans! Countrymen! Lend me your stolen Death Star plans!"

"The game's afoot - but let the wookiee win!"

"Now is the Winter of the planet Hoth made glorious Summer by the twin suns of Tatooine!"

JULIET - "My bounty is as boundless as the sea,
My love as deep; the more I give to thee,
The more I have, for both are infinite."

ROMEO - "I know"

PETRUCHIO - Good Lord, how bright and goodly shines the moon! 

KATHARINA - That's no moon! It's a space station.

PETRUCHIO - I say it is the moo... No you're right! (Shit!)

And Finally – Warwick goes all Columbo on viewing Gloucester's dead body, piecing together that he didn't die of natural causes but was rather done in! It's CSI Bury St. Edmund's!

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